I’m forever thankful that Ni-Kahk (my paternal grandmother) gave me the tools of encouragement, confidence, and the ability to use a dictionary to strengthen my reading skills. Having caught up to my peers and eventually surpassed many of them, the next major tool I received came from my mentor, whom I’ve mentioned in my opening … Continue reading Boundaries, Books, and Survival: A Teenager’s Toolkit for Chaos
Tag: finding himdag
Knowledge is Power: My Grandmother’s Tools
I don’t doubt the school did everything they could to help me, this was the tail end of the 90s and the data and tools we have now didn’t exist. It was the summer before fifth grade, and I was being advanced while the reading tests showed I was two years behind my peers. Teachers … Continue reading Knowledge is Power: My Grandmother’s Tools
Nurturing Resilience: Unveiling My Childhood Struggles
During my stay with Mehi Mohto’s (fire carried on the head) family this past summer, I reflected on how various events positively shaped my childhood. This period allowed me to gain a new perspective on resilience. An insightful 2017 article from The Atlantic redefined resilience for me: “Current [American] culture thinks of resiliency as gutting … Continue reading Nurturing Resilience: Unveiling My Childhood Struggles
Breaking the Chains: The End is a Beginning
Have you ever felt completely alone, even surrounded by people? The last couple of months have been agonizing as I've realized that for 34 years, most of my relatives and relationships have been abusive. It hit me when I realized that I have no one to trust or who loves me unconditionally. I was left … Continue reading Breaking the Chains: The End is a Beginning
Selfish: My Journey to Self-love
This journey continues... Sharing one's story should never induce trauma, a concept reiterated in my therapy sessions. In the past, accusations of dishonesty or dismissals after sharing my traumas led to an intensified sense of trauma and silence. I thought I’d rid myself of behaviors that invited potentially harmful people into my life, yet I … Continue reading Selfish: My Journey to Self-love
Make Changes NOW
Change the names back to their original INDIGENOUS names. They already have names. It's time for us to rise. The thunderbird will appear and it means a lot of different things depending on where you are... I suggest Squaw Peak be called Thunderbird Peak and Papago Peak changed to Segui Rise and "Sentinel Peak 'A' … Continue reading Make Changes NOW
The Unhinged Beast – Origins I
Forward: I'm apparently the type to need a forward ahead of my blog posts, but here we go, I guess. I have finally recognized the "perfection is the enemy of good" messages Co-Star as been telling me... Below is the beginning of another personal essay on the origins of the various characters that make me … Continue reading The Unhinged Beast – Origins I
So what’s a himdag, you ask?
I’ve been doing a ton of writing; I have lots of thoughts running around loose in my head. However, I’m not ready to go into detail, at least not without diving into what brought me to himdag (him-ee-dawk). So I guess explaining what it means is where we’ll start. I first heard the word himdag … Continue reading So what’s a himdag, you ask?
Why a blog and why now?
I started this blog for a few reasons, but I'll start with proposing to my BFF. I decided to get the ball rolling on getting married and starting a family with my best friend (and ex) of 12 years. While that is fantastic news under normal circumstances and a time for celebration, I proposed to … Continue reading Why a blog and why now?
and so we begin…
If life was a highway… If life is a highway, then I accidentally went down a dirt path at some point and have been lost since I was 19 and telling everyone I have met on this “life highway” that “I’m fine,” “I’m not lost,” “I know where I’m going….” And people believed me. The … Continue reading and so we begin…
finding himdag 